Dennis Dubay

It’s become a joke. In fairness to the subject at hand, I’ll come out and say that I don’t watch the NBA. I lost interest in it a long time ago. My basic theory is that the NBA is a work release program for thugs, rapists, dope fiends and various other types of criminals.

Can’t cut it in college … join the NBA.
Need a bevy of blonde bimbo’s to rape … join the NBA (the NFL will suspend you six games if you rape their blonde bimbos)

But this newest bit of greatness is where I sign off on the sport for good. And so it’s with great gratitude, that I thank you, Lebron James.

Thank you for allowing me to never watch “basketball” again.
Thank you for teaching our youth that it really is “all about me”.
Thank you for pulling your … and pissing on the values that John Wooden taught: Teamwork.

Don’t be surprised by that. The self named “King” of the NBA wouldn’t even accept a phone call from Michigan State University’s very well respected coach, Tom Izzo. No, Da King don’t take phone calls from college coaches.

(A practice he began when he realized he wouldn’t be able to cut class like he did in highschool. Plus, he wouldn’t get paid either…. sure, I’m making that up. I think. Who know’s anymore what’s real and make believe when it comes to our “star” athletes. Ask Reggie Bush about that)

Oh, how bad Cleavland must feel. Jilted family members will now lose their cherised seats at IHOP. Face the facts, he was leaving before he got there, Cleavland. He needs the blonde bimbos, the fast cars, the warm weather. You never had a chance, what with your mosquitos, your overweight hookers and public transit.

It was never in the cards.

Know what else isn’t in the cards? Legendary status like Magic Johnson, Larry Bird and Michael Jordan. You’ve proved you don’t care about the NBA, the CBA, or the CLV. But hey, you don’t owe them a damn thing son. Go on with your badself. Gets all that money you deserve.

It spends the same wherever you go.

But hey, Miami. Hey guys. Two ways this plays out.

1. He signs with you. Congrats. You just bought yourself the biggest ego the NBA has ever seen. You’ll never see a championship though. You’ll have record breaking crowds … sellouts to be sure.

So does the Ringling Brothers. Circus’s are fun to watch. But usually, you leave thinking … that was kind of a waste of time.

2. He swerves you. He signs with NY … cuz his ego won’t allow him to share the stage.

Welcome to King Nothings world.

(Or maybe I’m just jealous that he gets all this attention for playing a kids game. Either way, he’s a douche.)

(Oh, before everyone complains, no I don’t think all blondes are bimbos. So calm down … yeash.)