cloaked in a black
veil claiming to be
love

it was a ghost
that lived within
that catacomb of deceit

help me you yell
help me you plead
softly, you whisper
help me, i’m in need

we’re all in need
on our knees,
please
make it
stop

I was always
there, swimming in the unknown rivers of my
sanity.

to afraid to swim under
or over
just paddled in circles
that left me here longer
then the others

epiphanies were strange astrological deficiencies, to protect the
ones that set upon us

and in an outer spacey kind of way to protect me from
my reality

whatever that may be.

born with mortal skin
i wound the flesh
time and time and time again

not out of fear or revenge
just punching away at the
things i see before me

no prisoners on this ship
the message that i screamed
in side my head for days
made it easier to sleep that
way

blood is colorless in the dark
and the dark is where we must remain

our heavens and hells
are just planted, grave yard
stones turned into mazes
for the previous victims
entertainment.

glory to you
dead one,
as soon as i escape my
self built prison

then will i be victor
in this game of
no one really knows.

but it was the electrician
who found him
that
made it real

on a street
lake washington
to be exact
thats where
he went
for the final act

know one really
knows
what was going on
inside

doesn’t matter,
he died inside
that seattle room

shot gun blast

but i wonder
what would have
happened
had that
electrician
kept his mouth
shut

the heater is churning
out cold air, with
no help in its future

i stir in my chair,
swiping my hair
out of my eyes,
a new day staring
back at me

the computer screen
saver reminds me
to wash my hands
after pissing,
h1n1

in the background
i hear the door
buzz – a delivery
awaits

but no one is here
to sign for that
package

and a bird
sits outside
underneath the
clouds staring
at me outside the
office windows

while i wait
for the day
to end
and it’s only 7:24
in the morning

he’d throw rocks
at the clouds
and read comic
books till
the let him in

nestle quick
and burnt toast
his dinner

happy days
are here again.

she’d tell
him dad didn’t need
to know

they were practicing
for later on in life
but dad didn’t want
her to grow up

and she’d tug his
ear and say
“ok, eli”

and eli went about
his business
till one day dad
picked him up from
school …

you see,
his sister had gone
away

cuz her friend
that made the noises
had taken her

cuz they were
practicing for later
but he got mad
and wanted time
to go faster

if my desire
leaves me
if i find nothing
more to care
about

where do i go
i need the fight

the anger generates
my need to be

and if stop caring
will i still
be me?

sometimes i stare at
the sun and wonder
why it’s so dark

“i hear the pain in mona lisas eyes
the fear in gandhi’s words
the way temptation crossed Maehaks
mind every time he crossed the line
when temptation ended
and…”

you see there is a story i was told
of a deafman and his radio
that he’d carry all around
and play for the locals

he was crazy they said
but his music was beautiful
and it eased the minds of those
who came across the deafman

somehow he always knew
when the tape needed switched
always knowing when the end
started and the begining
began

children danced in the streets
as the deafman and his blind friend
walked past

laughing and jumping
jumping and laughing
laughing and jumping.

this is all they had,
all they had
this

the city burned
from drought and
ignorance
pity and
pride
the old
died
the young
danced

because of the deafman and his
radio

“… i see the fear in your eyes,
the discord in our color, but i love
you, i love you all”

on the side of the road
god knows where
we are but we turned right
and that was wrong

fireworks and sirens
behind us,
freedom ahead
but we tuned out
and that was wrong

side of the road
and she’s in cuffs
like i like her like
but this isn’t right
cuz this was wrong

patted her down for a few
then patted her down some more
felt her up like a common whore
and all we were doing
was looking for a score

to a baseball game
on the radio
when i turned right
and this went wrong

he’d mentioned
something
about it being
platonic?
copesetic?
something with a tic
at the end
not the beg

wait

i remember

there was this sound
that came from the sound
and i was wondering where
the sound was coming from
when the sound said son
the sound is sounding
sad we need to find it

this shit was kinda weak
this time.